Category Archives: luckiest girl in the world

The “After” Of Almost Dying

January 20, 2012

Tuesday night, after The Incident, I thought I deserved a night with my couch and DVR. I did nothing but cuddle up with Ben and watch “Intervention”. Because nothing says “I love you, Son” more than watching a young woman inject herself with crystal meth.

I couldn’t get the thought out of my mind that I was in my warm home, safe with my family instead of a hospital bed. You might be thinking, shut up and get over this already but if you were in that car with me, you’d be high fiving me for staying out of the fetal position under the covers while sucking my thumb.

By Wednesday evening I was more than ready for Yoga. Thinking, stupidly, that it would do wonders for my still tense muscles.

There were only three of us in class so while we were waiting to see if more showed up we talked about the storm the day before. Me being me and having the disease I Have To Share Everything-idious, I told them about my spin out.

Everyone gasped and then the woman next to me, who I’ve never seen in class before, looked me straight in the eyes with the most serious look and said, “Someone is looking out for you. You have a higher purpose in this life and you better figure out what that is.”

And with that let’s start some belly breathing!

Her words hit me like a Mac truck. I felt sad and grateful all at the same time. I got my B.A. in Denial which meant that I had ignored the emotional aspect of Tuesday morning successfully until 6:30pm Wednesday night at the Y while doing downward dog.

I finally took my head out of the sand.

The fact that the YMCA is literally right off the beltline with windows in the yoga studio facing it didn’t help the, “I’mfineI’mfineShutupdon’ttalkaboutitI’mfine” thing I had going on.

If the class was bigger I would have left. But since I was a third of the population I stayed and pretended I was really into each pose with my eyes closed to keep from crying.

My muscles were screaming all through class. Instead of helping, doing poses like fish made my neck begin an Occupy Becky’s Body movement.

Somehow I made it through but by the end of class when we do our final relaxation, corpse pose, (p.s. I’m super good at this pose) I realized how tense I really was. I couldn’t let go of any muscle. As I laid there I realized my cheeks were wet with tears.

Tuesday morning was awful and terrifying. But I made it. I’m not sure that I have a higher purpose in this life other than winning the award for owning the most black cardigans from Old Navy, and I don’t think I need to figure that out or even own that. It’s too much. And seriously, maybe it was all just dumb luck.

Regardless, I’ll just be grateful all is well and enjoy my massage tomorrow afternoon that much more.

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gratitude isn't just an attitude, luckiest girl in the world

Eddie

July 19, 2011

Everyone, this is Eddie.

Eddie, this is everyone.

This 14 pound fluff ball has stolen my heart, run away with it and won’t let it go.

Well, its either my heart or my flip flop.

Eddie’s life consists of three things.  Sleeping, chewing or looking for something to chew and going “potty outside! Good potty outside!”

My life since Saturday consists of three things. Doing as much as I can while he sleeps, trying to get the bad things out of his mouth and the good things in and making a fool of myself to the neighbors by doing my “good potty outside!” dance.

Matt and I will never feel we missed out on having a baby together because we have Eddie.

The first night we hid in the office while silently praying he would stop crying.  We did the whole “I’m going in there.”  “No! Don’t!” “I can’t stand this!” “Becky, listen, he hasn’t cried for 2 minutes”, the “here you take him I’ve been with him all day and I’m exhausted” and of course the “Oh!  He’s so cute!”

The nights have slowly gotten better.  The second night he either didn’t cry all night or I was too exhausted to hear him.  Last night he just whined once (or once that I was conscious enough to notice).  And right when I opened the door he peed and came right back in.  The fact that the surface of the sun is cooler than Madison this week helps in the “Lady, I’m wearing a down coat ALL THE TIME.  Let me back in!”

I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t 1000% puppy all the time.  I’m off this whole week to just stare at him and get my pant leg out of his mouth.  Last night when Matt got home I said “I’m going out. Somewhere.  Even if it’s just to the grocery store, I have to get out.”  And what did I do but end up at PetSmart while the smell of his fuzzy little head lingered in my nose.

I’m a sucker for this dog.  Hook line and stinker, I’m done.  His paws especially make me swoon.

I often think about putting one in my mouth and taking just a nibble.

Every day gets easier.  He hasn’t had an accident since Saturday (yes. really.), he is walking on the leash better each day (if you count some sitting in the middle of the sidewalk and hopping from side to side “better”) he has stopped chewing on my dresser knobs and has given up on pulling the living room rug into his crate.  My poor hydrangea bush is wondering where all this “getting better” is coming from since it gets a puppy pounce and another leaf torn off every time Eddie is out.

It’s not just me that’s in major puppy love.  We all are.  And we wouldn’t think of going back.

Thank you Eddie for coming into our lives.  We’re all better for it.

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luckiest girl in the world, Puppy!

Are You There June? It’s Me, Mikkimoto

June 23, 2011

My entire adult life I’ve been a very independent woman. I embraced the, “I Am Woman Hear Me Roar” slogan with full force. Especially when I had it tattooed on my chest.

I never liked to cook (“take-out” was cooking and making cereal was gourmet), I hated laundry with passion (have been known to buy new clothing instead of washing the dirty stuff) and I often looked at my toilet bowl and thought, “Eh, the next flush will get rid of that.”

Being a cooking/cleaning housewife was a dirty word.

That was until a ring was put on my finger and a house was bought. And now? As cliche as it is, June Cleaver’s spirit has inhabited my body like Patrick Swayze took over Whoopi Goldberg.

There have been times while unloading the dishwasher I’ve caught myself whistling. This is disgusting and unacceptable behavior for a woman who used to use the dishwasher as a kitchen cabinet.

I do laundry and actually FOLD IT THE SAME DAY! I have actually kept up with the laundry and therefore found clothes I didn’t know I had. Gone are the days of neighborhood children coming over to climb the Mikkimoto Dirty Clothes Mountain. Sorry kids.

I cook in our new beautiful kitchen with all our wedding gifts and I feel something weird. A warmth in my stomach, (no, I don’t have to poop) I feel… HAPPINESS! I LIKE TO COOK! FOOD! FOR MY FAMILY! WHO EATS IT! ALL OF IT!

The other night Matt and Ben were at a Brewer’s game so I had the entire evening to myself. Did I spend that time at happy hour with a friend? Nope. Did I lay on the couch for hours watching a “Tori & Dean sTORIbook wedding” marathon while playing “Words With Friends”? Sadly no. Did I go to the grocery store with coupons in hand and come home to make a Pioneer Woman recipe for dinner the next night that took me two hours and then cleaned the entire kitchen afterwards? YES! I DID! AND I ENJOYED IT!

WHAT THE HELL IS HAPPENING TO ME!?

I need a Housewife Intervention.

The nauseating truth is… I’m not sure when I’ve been happier. Things right now are just good. Even Ben said the other day, “Life is good right now, isn’t it?”

I LOVE my house. Every inch. It’s fun to empty the dishwasher because everything has a place. Not to mention it’s all new wedding presents.  “Hi cutie spatula.  You go here.  Remember?  Say hi to Mr. Spoon…”

I love finding new recipes, cooking and then watching Matt and Ben clean their plates. It’s is better than finding the cutest sandals in my size 75% off.  Well maybe not better than that but it’s really good shit.

So if I am turning into a foul mouthed (some habits die hard) June Cleaver, so be it.

However, if I start wearing pearls and aprons while saying things like, “That’s no way to talk, this is Sunday” or “Now [Ben], I want you to go in the living room and pick up those orange peels that you left on the coffee table. If your father comes home and sees them he’ll be in a terrible mood all through dinner.”, then all bets are off and send help immediately.

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cooking, laundry, luckiest girl in the world, married life

Showered with Love

February 8, 2011

On Saturday these two lovely women:

also known as Darcy and my mother, threw me the world’s best bridal shower. Really. The Guinness Book of World’s Records people came over and proclaimed it The Best.

Complete with the world’s cutest name tags

and a cake meant for a Princess (Mikkimoto). Take that Middleton!

That crown? It’s hand-made of sugar but something I can keep (and maybe wear around my bedroom while dancing to Madonna’s Material Girl) forever. Yes this amazing piece of art was made by the same magician who is making our wedding cake.

If this crown ends up on the wedding cake I have no idea how it got there. Seriously, once you have a crown on your cake, can you ever go back to a non-royalty cake? Me thinks not.

(that thing on my head isn’t a dead fuzzy flamingo, it’s a crown that Darcy’s daughter wanted me to wear. When a 5 year old with excellent taste in all things Princess asks you to wear something, you don’t say “no”.)

Oh and? This cake was totally sugar free. So I had cake. For the first time in almost a year. And it was good.

There were no games at this gig, which made some guests cheer while others sighed with relief. Instead we were just going to go around the room and quickly introduce ourselves and everyone say how they knew me. Simple enough, right?

Apparently when you have been as single as long as I have, not to mention have been dating as aggressively and vocally as moi (“I will NEVER EVER FIND the right guy!) when you do finally find the man of your dreams, people are reduced to tears. Literally.

I was blessed to have all these amazing women from all parts of my life at this event.

These two knew me from college and 6th grade.

These lovely ladies are women from the neighborhood who have known me since I was five. I baby-sat their kids and when Susan said I was a role model to their girls, more sobs ensued.

Friends new and old gathered.

The outpouring of love was so intense (a rep for water proof mascara would have made a killing in this crowd) my mom handed out Kleenex as she said, “This is like group!”

After an HOUR, we all got a grip and some food. With full bellies, I was surrounded with amazingly generous gifts.

The time just flew. When people started to put their coats on, I wanted to throw a temper tantrum fit for a Princess. But I instead I held it together and just hugged and thanked and said, “Can’t wait to see you at the wedding!”

Now instead of wanting to buy the world a Coke and keep it company, I’d want everyone to experience a day like I had on Saturday.

And maybe also teach the world to sing in perfect harmony, because that would just be nice.

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friends, luckiest girl in the world, thats one way to end a post, wedding